Make new friends and keep the old,
One in silver and the other gold.

Ever heard of this song? Or phrases which mean almost the same thing? I seriously don't get how and why people like you will change so damn drastically. Yeah sure bad things that happened left huge impacts on you but I don't see other people acting the same shitty way like you are right now. Please (Yes I'm actually hoping) get a grip of your life. Don't be so f*cking pathetic and let everyone into your life JUST.LIKE.THAT.

Don't push those who helped you go through the worst in your life, those who actually stayed by your side when no one else gave a fuck about you, those who sincerely cared for you. You once said that let new people into your life. I see you doing that, but who gives you the right to push and diss those who USED to be your friends? Who gives you the right to f*cking do that?

F*cking get a grip of yourself. Don't you dare hurt them again, cause seriously, you don't want to mess with me. They actually talked and gave a damn about you but is this how you treat them? Letting the old ones go and filling all the gaps with new people? WTF is wrong with you? I seriously don't get you or how can you act so f*cking optimistic when they are actually sad for you and sad for what happened.

fuck you and please get a grip.