It’s a natural occurring process, no doubt about that. Lives have been taken, souls are gone, but one’s presence will still be sensed. somehow.. It’s hard for me to fully comprehend the fact that you’re gone. I still can’t grasp the fact that you’re not going to be there for my Graduation Day which is a year plus from now. But all I know is that you’re going to be there for me, looking down upon me, smiling and feeling proud of me.
Whatever you’ve promised Joey and I, whatever you’ve said and told us about what happened in the past & will happen in the future, all the soup and dishes that you’ve cooked for us for dinner & CNY, I’ll remember them. You were the one of the closest aunts that I will ever have. You were that “I-can’t-stand-your-bullshit” person, and I like that a lot about you although it can be intimidating at times. You were ( past tense.. :/ ) really important to me, koko. I’ll miss you dearly and I know you’re in a better place. A place with no agony and pain. You don’t have to suffer anymore! J
No more needles, no more hair loss, no more bruises.
It’s going to be a bit weird because mummy wouldn’t have to turn into your house anymore, we wouldn’t have to go to Pelangi for the random trips, we wouldn’t have to wake up early in the morning for breakfast or brunch. It’s an adjustment, something that I’ve got to learn to get used to. I know it’s stupid to cry because I know you’ll be back in my life.
I know it’s only going to hit me in the face when I’m in Malaysia. When I finally realise that you’re not there, staring at the TV, waiting for your Time. Nevertheless, you’ll return to us, all of us, and be that good ol’ koko once again. I’ll miss you a lot koko. Stay safe on the other side alright? J